Warm Southern Breeze

"… there is no such thing as nothing."

Just in time for Christmas!

Posted by Warm Southern Breeze on Monday, November 22, 2010

*!* Conspicuous Consumption *!*

*!* Consumer Alert *!*

From our “Useless Junk Aimed at the Stupidly Über Wealthy” Department:

With “Black Friday” looming in a few days, it’s not too early to begin thinking about what you’ll get for that person whom “has everything”!

Perhaps you work on Wall Street, or are a Chief Executive of a Multi-National Corporation. This was a VERY GOOD year for you! Even with the economic meltdown which is described as the Great Recession, and unarguably the greatest economic catastrophe since the Great Depression, you’re riding tall in the saddle, and eating high on the hog. What with taxpayer funded bonuses that more than quadruple your salary, leveraged buy-outs, stock options, and a net wealth that exceeds the GNP of some nations, you’re ready to party like it’s 1999!

You’ve saved your elite Wall Street pals beaucoup bottom line bucks by “outsourcing” materials, manufacturing and labor – otherwise known as Americans jobs – all with the help of a sympathetic congress, which enacted laws like NAFTA, CAFTA and other “free trade” laws and agreements that rewarded you for abandoning these shores for exotic lands where you can run even more roughshod over people whom already have no protection from unsafe and unscrupulous practices. You’re like a unfaithful lover, who whores to anyone who will pay your price. And not only are you cheap, but you’re easy, too!

Now that you’ve pillaged, raped, burned and otherwise stolen Billions from Stockholders and the American Public, the question arises – What to do with it?

This monstrosity of junk can be yours, with that extra $350,000 burning a hole in your pocket.

The Flying Car – Hammacher Schlemmer.

The Flying Car.
Designed by a team of MIT graduates, this is the vehicle that converts from a street-legal automobile to a Light Sport aircraft in 30 seconds. A 100 hp, four-cylinder engine powers both the craft’s three-bladed propeller for a maximum airspeed of 115 mph and its continuously variable transmission, rear-wheel drive to above 65 mph when on the road. When the wings are folded, the craft easily stores in a home’s garage. It can be driven to one’s preferred airfield on four DOT-approved tires with full road suspension. An electro-mechanical system is activated from inside the two-person cockpit to deploy the self-locking wings into place for take-off provided by a 1,700′ runway. Built to fly within VFR conditions, sophisticated modern avionics aid navigation from a touch-screen LCD. Dual pedals and a joystick manage the craft’s flight control surfaces–dual rudders, ailerons, and stabilator–while a steering wheel, accelerator, and brake control its road movement. Its 23-gallon gas tank provides a 425 nautical mile range (35 mpg on the road), indispensable for easy day trips from Long Island to Martha’s Vineyard. Carbon fiber, titanium, and aluminum construction. Includes comprehensive familiarization with craft. Requires a Sport Pilot Certificate. Special conditions and guarantee limitations apply. Please call 1-800-227-3528 for details. Car mode 6′ 8″ H x 7′ 6″ W x 19′ 6″ L; Aircraft mode 6′ 6″ H x 26′ 6″ W x 19′ 9″ L. (Empty weight 970 lbs.)

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